GOSH: LCBO puts limits on electricity consumed by wine writers

TRAWNA – (GOSH Wine News Services) – The LCBO, A Crown Corporation, today announced severe limits on the availability of electricity to members of the wine press.

 

Wine writers line up in droves every Friday at the LCBO Sensory Tasting Lab to recharge their laptops for the weekend. Some of them even use their laptops to write wine notes.

 

Apparently, the massive downloading of kilowatts interferes with the toasters, electric kettles, and microwave ovens in use by LCBO staff on those Fridays, from 11:30 AM to 2:30 PM.

 

Several severe brownouts -- and occasionally blown fuses -- have resulted from the unique combination of laptops and office lunch preparations.

 

Said an LCBO, A Crown Corporation, spokesperson: "Until we get our $4 million grant from Infrastructure Ontario to re-wire this building, I'm afraid we're going to have to ban the re-juicing of laptops between the hours of 11:30 and 2:30 each day. The good people of Ontario cannot afford to keep paying for free use of electricity by the wine press. Do you know how much juice costs these days?"

 

Wine writers will be instructed to either pull out the plug within that time period or go to lunch. One hooked-up wine writer said, "I'd like to go to lunch, but where do you eat around here? The Star cafeteria?"

 

Apparently, there is enough money in Infrastructure Ontario to support a lunchroom at the LCBO, A Crown Corporation. But its implementation may be delayed until the proper liquor license has been obtained from the AGCO, Also A Crown Corporation. Said one writer, "This isn't over yet…not by a long shot."

 

More on this story as it develops – stay tuned.

 

Chimo!  www.deantudor.com

 

 

Niagara-on-the-Lake winery can't put Niagara-on-the-Lake on labels

Saturday, December 13, 2008   St, Catharines Standard

Niagara-on-the-Lake winery can't put Niagara-on-the-Lake on labels

Posted By MONIQUE BEECH, STANDARD STAFF

Protected terms under the 1999 Vintners Quality Alliance Act.

Wineries that are not VQA approved are prohibited from using the following terms:

Vintners Quality Alliance.

VQA.

Ontario.

Pelee Island.

Niagara Peninsula.

Niagara-on-the-Lake.

Niagara River.

Niagara Lakeshore.

Four Mile Creek.

St. David's Bench.

Niagara Escarpment.

Lincoln Lakeshore.

Creek Shores.

Beamsville Bench.

Twenty Mile Bench.

Short Hills Bench.

Vinemount Ridge.

Lake Erie North Shore.

Prince Edward County.

Estate Bottled.

Vineyard.

Meritage.

Icewine.

Botrytized.

Botrytis Affected.

B.A.

Totally Botrytized.

Totally Botrytis Affected.

T.B.A.

Late Harvest Wine.

Select Late Harvest Wine.

Special Select Late Harvest Wine.

Vin du Curé.

Blanc de Noirs.

Icewine Dosage.

Dosage of Icewine.

Sparkling Icewine.

Sunnybrook Farm Estates Winery owner Gerald Goertz uses only Ontario grown fruits to make his popular wines.

But under provincial government rules, Goertz can't put "Ontario" on his black currant or Thirty-seven terms including such words as Niagara-on-the-Lake — where his winery is located — and Niagara Peninsula are off limits, too.

Only wineries producing grape vino that meets Vintners Quality Alliance of Ontario rules can use the provincially regulated terms.

More at: http://www.realontariowine.ca/?q=oct0108scsnotl

Chimo!  www.deantudor.com

 

 

GOSH: Vincor Comes to the Rescue of the City of Vanoc

Vincor Comes to the Rescue of the City of Vanoc

VANOC – (GOSH Wine News Services) – In a stunning announcement to be made shortly at a hurriedly convened press conference, the City of Vanoc appears to have a solution to its Owe-lympic shortfalls and shortcomings. The City of Vanoc has entered discussions that would see it borrow an estimated $800-million to consolidate funding around the problematic Owe-lympic athletes village.

Top wine investigative reporter Brett Grimsby has been on the scene for weeks now, and he files this story based on several interviews with Miffed Mole, the collective name for sources who are familiar with the situation, and who spoke to him on condition of anonymity because they were not authorized to divulge details while they were very close to the centre of discussions and while the matter under consideration had not yet been announced to the public --

Vincor, A Constellation Company, has decided to increase its donation to the City of Vanoc for the 2010 Owe-lympics.

In addition to the proceeds from its Esprit CIC/POC wine sales, Vincor, A Constellation Company, has taken on the distribution of China Red tetra pak wines to be delivered to Dollerama stores across the nation. In the meantime, Vincor, A Constellation Company, has been developing a white wine counterpart with the co-operation of the Ontario Viniculture Association, presumably comprising unsold wines remaining from Farmers' Market sales. It is to be known as Sheet White.

The partial proceeds from the sales of both of these wines will help pay down the Owe-lympic village debt, so that the good people of Canada, A Have Country, will not be on the hook for added expenditures. The venture has the blessings of the Ontario, A Have-Not Province, government.

The press conference will kick off with a baked goods sale in aid of the relief of the City of Vanoc and the athletes village, soon to be downgraded to athletes hamlet.

More on this story as it unfolds on the Left Coast…

Chimo! www.deantudor.com

GOSH: GTA Dollar Stores to Offer Wines in Tetra Paks

TRAWNA - (GOSH Wine News Services) -- According to top investigative wine
reporter Brett Grimsby, the Ministry of Trade and Economic Development will
soon announce a new PPP co-operation for the Greater Toronto Area.

In conjunction with Dollerama stores, the LCBO, A Crown Corporation, will
lease the rights to sell modestly-priced wine at the larger, more urbane
Dollerama locations. The source for the wines will be China, with a 1%
addition of Canadian grape wine.

Grimsby interviewed sources who are familiar with the situation, and who
spoke to him on condition of anonymity because they were not authorized to
divulge details while they were very close to the centre of discussions and
while the matter under consideration had not yet been announced to the
public.

Wine will be available in only in the 187mL tetra paks. This means no
deposit will be payable (and thus no refunds) and the price structure will
fit inside the "dollar" mandate of these non-premium markets.

In a statement from the Government of Ontario, A Have-Not Province, the LCBO
quality assurance labs, concerned about the possibility of foreign additives
such as melamine, will be conducting regularly unscheduled testing.

The rollout is scheduled for just before the Chinese New Year. Initially,
only one wine will be available: China Red.

More on this story as it develops.

Chimo! www.deantudor.com

LCBO to authorize new warning labels on wine bottles (many sourced from J.K.Macanas via the Internet)

WARNINGS ON WINE LABELS IN ONTARIO TO CHANGE --

 

 

TRAWNA -- (GOSH Wine News Services) -- According to my sources at the LCBO, A Crown Corporation, new warning labels are being considered for attaching to wine botttles. These warnings apply ONLY to wine beverages, and have not yet had Ministry approval.

 

But watch for them....

 

* WARNING: The consumption of this wine may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

 

* WARNING: The consumption of this wine is totally based on Parker Numbers. Do not consume if the wine is rated under 85 points.

 

* WARNING: The consumption of this wine may make you think you are shouting when you are not.

 

* WARNING: The consumption of this wine may make you read "Food & Drink" magazine.

 

* WARNING: The consumption of this wine may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.

 

* WARNING: The consumption of this wine may cause you to think you can sing.

 

* WARNING: The consumption of this wine may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four AM.

 

* WARNING: The consumption of this wine may only occur when the Lot Number is the same as the CSPC Number.

 

* WARNING: The consumption of this wine may lead you to think people are laughing at you.

 

Also under consideration are site-specific, terroir-driven "warnings" for Ontario wines --

 

* WARNING: The consumption of this wine depends on whether the label says "Cellared in Canada" or not.

 

* WARNING: The consumption of this wine may lead you to wonder why the name "Ontario" should not appear on non-VQA Ontario wine bottles.

 

* WARNING: The consumption of this wine is based on the premise that Fruit Wines of Ontario will be available at farmers' markets.

 

 

More as this story develops...Stay tuned

 

 

Chimo!  www.deantudor.com