GOSH: Export support for Fregggie(TM) added to AgriMarketing Program

REAL NEWS: "(Marketwire - Sept. 25, 2009) - The Government of Canada is investing $318,100 to help Canada's grape and wine producers increase international markets for their top quality products."

 

TRAWNA – (GOSH Wine News Services) – In a stunning departure from the norm, the Federal Minister of Agriculture today announced that Freggie™, the fruit-vegetable "Cellared in Canada" wine, has been added to the list of VQA wines eligible to receive assistance through the AgriMarketing Program under the Growing Forward framework.

 

Freggie™ expects to get a decent portion of the $318,100 pie, given that it is the wine of choice amongst eHealth employees (both current and former).

 

Said Agri-Food Canada, "Our Government understands the importance of assisting our producers and processors to build on their success and increase global exports of world-class Canadian wines."

 

Freggie™ was developed as an alternative to the "Cellared in Canada" grape wine that has lately been in disgrace. It was to be an original blend of 70% Ontario fruit wine and 30% Ontario vegetable wine. Its main purpose was to eat up surpluses of produce.

 

Lately, though, producers of the newly invasive kudzu plant have been pressuring the Government of Ontario, A Have-Not Province, to add kudzu to the mix. If this happens, then the proportion of fruits to vegetables will change. Sources say that fruit will come out on top at 51%, with vegetables forming the rest of the mix. The status of the addition of Ontario water is still unclear, but would certainly go a long way to reducing the turgidity caused by fibrous vegetables.

 

A spokesperson for the LCBO, A Crown Corporation, said, "We welcome any new alcoholic product so long as it passes the Quality Assurance Laboratory tests and is promoted responsibly. Despite the past failures of the LCBO's storage policies (we did indeed NOT have rubber walls as our former Chairman said), we are now open for business. A new source of latex has been found, and we can now offer any and all products made in Canada."

 

The AgriMarketing program, with an $88 million budget over four years, is assisting producers and processors to increase exports of Canada's safe, high-quality world-class products around the world. The program provides funding to develop and implement long-term international strategies and to undertake activities such as international market development, brand-building and industry-to-industry trade advocacy. Launched on April 7, 2009, the AgriMarketing program is part of the Trade and Market Development Program under Growing Forward.

 

It's a pity that Freggie™ (and other touted Canadian wines) will get only the pittance of $318,100 out of $88 million.

 

More on this story after top investigative wine reporter Brett Grimsby finds out why $100 was added to the original announced figure of $318K…

 

Chimo!  www.deantudor.com