TRAWNA – (GOSH Wine News Services) – The Foxy Wine News Network, watched by just over 4,000 viewers on a weeknight (fewer on the weekend), today announced its Christmas Holiday television line-up.
On Monday, December 12, at 9 PM (after the kiddies have gone to bed) enjoy "Snag It, Bag It and Tag It" – a guide to every cheap wine offered by the Liberal Control of Beverages in Ontario, A Clown, er, Clone, er, Crown Corporation of A Have-Not Province Controlled by The Grate McGinty. It's a two hour show, with about an hour for red wines and an hour for whites and roses. It is the same sort of deal as offered by the Board's "Brood & Think" magazine, that is, the entire shot is paid for by underachieving wine agents who must make ends meet in this age of The Scrooge. Repeats endlessly after every midnight during the rest of December, until noon the next day.
On Tuesday, December 13, at 9 PM, enjoy "Mulled Wine Escapades", the adventures of a would-be Santa who decided to arrive EARLY on December 23 and cause havoc with the dispensing of toys and favours. He becomes the victim of accepting too much mulled wine and has chills and spills on his sleigh route, led by a really red-nosed Rudolph with clove-nutmeg-cinnamon breath. Again, not one for the kiddies. Repeats every Tuesday until Christmas.
On Wednesday, December 14, again at 9 PM, watch the "LCBO EggNog Special" – store managers decide to compete against each other in the creation of their own locally flavoured eggnog concoctions. Watch out for the Greek neighbourhood versions. Recipes furnished upon request, provided suitable ID and passport photo is submitted. Repeats every Wednesday. This show will be broadcast LIVE: you must be of drinking age in order to enter the studio.
On Thursday, December 15, at 8 PM (note: one hour earlier than the other shows) – "The Durham Warehouse at Christmas". Watch how fork lift operators compete with each other in the stacking of thousands of cases of wines, beers, and spirits. This is one the kids will enjoy since it is always fun to see cartons get smashed in attempts to stack SKUs. Repeats every night at 8 PM until they get it right.
On Friday, December 16, at 9 PM, we'll have "The Consignment Warehouse Christmas Show" where the wine agents go virtual and decide to sell their wines in time for Christmas. Competition is fierce, but will the ladies' teams win again this year as they strive for a Three-Peat? Find out, but after the kids go to bed. Again, this reality show will be LIVE, but repeated endlessly on Foxy Wine News Network.
Then, on Saturday, December 17, at 11 PM, in the beginning of the run up to Christmas and New Year's, Foxy Wine News Network will have "Bubbles", a reality show which will be selling Champagnes with sex appeal. Details are being kept under wraps, but will be revealed as we draw closer to the time of the show. All we can say is this is where Bubbles meets Brandy, and the fur will be flying. Repeats on Christmas Eve and New Year's Eve at 11 PM, and then it fizzles out.
On Sunday, December 18, at noon – equal time will be given on the "Charmat Express Hour" to those loser non-Champagne sparkling wines.
Foxy hopes you enjoy all these shows. Keep informed.
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