TOPIC HEADLINE: GEGEC ARRIVES IN STYLE!
GOTHIC EPICURES has announced a new annual wine competition for Ontario
– the Great Expectations of Grand Expectorations Challenge (GEGEC). It
will be held in conjunction with each fall's wine harvest.
There will be sixteen participants: four teams of four members,
representing the various wine trade constituencies in Ontario: wine
writers from the Wine Writers' Circle of Canada, winemakers from
Vintners Quality Alliance Ontario, agents from the Ontario Imported
Wine-Spirit-Beer Association, and product consultants from the Liquor
Control Board of Ontario. All of the wine industry partners are on
board with this one. Because of their native advantage, gap-toothed
personnel are to be excluded from the teams but may serve as back-up
judges.
Competition rules specify four categories of expectoration:
1) distance
2) accuracy
3) volume
4) spillage control
and there will be a contest for each one. Contestants will wear white
shirts or blouses, but advertising space on their backs is available
for rent. Final judging will have aggregate totals for all team
members.
Base material will come from "Product of Canada" red wines. The
colour is needed for determining the winners, particularly in checking
for minimal dribble down their fronts. Special guest Chris Bosch will
adjudicate. In case of a tie, there will be a grand spit-out based on
the accuracy of hitting a Champagne bucket from increasingly farther
distances.
Sawdust has been contributed by the Canadian oak barrel industry.
Bibs come from Vincor, A Constellation Company. The winning team
receives an award trophy: the Golden Spittoon, which is custom-designed
in the shape of a TetraPak. Winners' names will be inscribed on this
prize, whether they like it or not.
Location: Bocce/boules courts at the patio of Allen's. Tickets are
available from major liquor outlets at a modest cost (just over $10),
subject to the usual LCBO mark-ups and delivery fees. Sadie Darby is
the chief organizer. Note: special guest Paul Giamatti will reprise his
role from "Sideways", and Tony Aspler from the Ontario Wine Awards will
present the Golden Spittoon after he cleans and polishes it. Final
judging is by Dean Tudor of Gothic Epicures, Larry Paterson of the
Amateur Winemakers of Ontario, and free-lance investigative journalist
David Menzies. It is hoped that the event will pay for itself by
renting protective space suits to observers in the audience.
Refreshments will be served.
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